Tuesday, September 20, 2016

Heartburn

you know something is wrong
when you can feel your body parts
when they let you know they are there
when they scream at you and holler
until you can't deny them your attention
funny bones
ears
eyelids
stomach
and back
they are supposed to just be there
doing their thing
but every now and then, they cry out for your focus
thus
my heart hurts
it burns
it feels like I swallowed a fireball
jalapeno pepper
burning
indigestion
difficulties digesting life

but it'll pass
the heartburn will cease
and I won't feel my heart again
and everything will be alright


Sunday, September 11, 2016

Pound Cake

I once read a devotional comparing life to a pound cake.  A woman had her daughter or granddaughter to taste individual ingredients.  Of course they didn't taste good:  flour, baking powder, etc.  But then the woman mixed the ingredients together at the right proportions. 



She poured the batter in the pan, and baked the cake.  When the little girl came to taste the ingredients the second time (this time, combined, and baked), she tasted a delightful cake.  Is that not how life can be?  Some ingredients for success or fruition of a dream can taste awful in isolation; however, in God's hands, combined with other ingredients, processed through heat...can result in the tasty pound cakes of life.  The metaphor from my devotional crossed my mind as I baked the other night. As did Romans 8:28.   I know I am to find comfort in this.  Every time I bite into a slice of pound cake, I want to remember that all things are working together for my good.


My Hope: Not One Tear In Vain


Wednesday, September 7, 2016

When It Rains


When it rains...
it sometimes drizzles
sometimes it's a mist
and sometimes
it simply pours
Sometimes it's my fault
And sometimes it's not
Sometimes when it rains
it pours
drip drops of different hues and sizes
Sometimes when it rains it pours
and sometimes when it pours
the best thing for me to do
is be still
acknowledge the rain
honor the rain
rather than futility denying or resisting it
surrendering to it
honoring the rain on the outside
without letting it cause flooding and sinking on the inside
Sometimes when it rains it pours
and I want to cry with the rain
letting my tears fall
like the drops falling from the sky
rinsing the earth
and cleansing my soul
Sometimes when it rains it pours
turning light blue skies
into gray overcasts
Yes, sometimes when it rains it pours
darkening my view
Nevertheless, the Son is always shining
and soon the rain will yield
clouds parting and passing
almost as quickly as they came


Monday, September 5, 2016

Headache

My head is aching
pressure has built up
robbing me of joy
putting ants in my pants
I am angst to get up and go
yet weighted so
my legs are giant sloths

thoughts running like Jackie Joyner Kersee
imaginations
what ifs
what has beens
weight


The Best Place to Be

sometimes there's nowhere to go
but here
no better place
no better position
than to get down
on ones knees
and pray
and pour it all out
before the only One
who can really fix "it"
so I lay down my keys
I log off the internet
I put my phone on silent and push it away
and I cry out
expecting to be heard
expecting to receive help
expecting an exchange
expecting my headache to be exchanged
for peace
and my heartache to be exchanged
for joy
on bent knee I fight
so I can stand up victoriously

Saturday, September 3, 2016

Art Therapy


Behind the drip of the drop of most of my paint
fell first a tear from my heart
brush strokes, cotton swabbing
disinfecting my wounds
my wound, my wounded heart and eyes
pressing mix-media fixtures in place, 
adding pressure to stop the flow of blood
giving adhesives time enough to adhere jewels and stones- adding to works flare and the perfect touch
giving God time to heal
"As you walk, you will be healed"
echos in my ears
bench pressing tasks
pushing past depression and fatigue
face tightened from the winds of life
smiles no longer coming with ease
eyes glazed over like mod podge works
disappointment clouds my eyes
yet mahogany crayons under the heat of a blow dryer
permit fluid movement again
and brown skin and red heart under the light of the SON
regain elasticity again
they stretch
they smile freely again
they bend
they grow
they love anyway
they hope again
and even glazed eyes can become new again
as I let the drip drop
from my eyes and onto canvases
a cycle of healing
and living
and growing
exhaling
healing and freeing my soul within