When It Rains

When it rains...

it sometimes drizzles

sometimes it's a mist

and sometimes

it simply pours

Sometimes it's my fault

And sometimes it's not

Sometimes when it rains

it pours

drip drops of different hues and sizes

Sometimes when it rains it pours

and sometimes when it pours

the best thing for me to do

is be still

acknowledge the rain

honor the rain

rather than futility denying or resisting it

surrendering to it

honoring the rain on the outside

without letting it cause flooding and sinking on the inside

Sometimes when it rains it pours

and I want to cry with the rain

letting my tears fall

like the drops falling from the sky

rinsing the earth

and cleansing my soul

Sometimes when it rains it pours

turning light blue skies

into gray overcasts

Yes, sometimes when it rains it pours

darkening my view

Nevertheless, the Son is always shining

and soon the rain will yield

clouds parting and passing

almost as quickly as they came

Headache

My head is aching
pressure has built up
robbing me of joy
putting ants in my pants
I am angst to get up and go
yet weighted so
my legs are giant sloths

thoughts running like Jackie Joyner Kersee
imaginations
what ifs
what has beens
weight

The Best Place to Be

sometimes there's nowhere to go
but here
no better place
no better position
than to get down
on ones knees
and pray
and pour it all out
before the only One
who can really fix "it"
so I lay down my keys
I log off the internet
I put my phone on silent and push it away
and I cry out
expecting to be heard
expecting to receive help
expecting an exchange
expecting my headache to be exchanged
for peace
and my heartache to be exchanged
for joy
on bent knee I fight
so I can stand up victoriously

Art Therapy

Behind the drip of the drop of most of my paint
fell first a tear from my heart
brush strokes, cotton swabbing
disinfecting my wounds
my wound, my wounded heart and eyes
pressing mix-media fixtures in place, 
adding pressure to stop the flow of blood
giving adhesives time enough to adhere jewels and stones- adding to works flare and the perfect touch
giving God time to heal
"As you walk, you will be healed"
echos in my ears
bench pressing tasks
pushing past depression and fatigue
face tightened from the winds of life
smiles no longer coming with ease
eyes glazed over like mod podge works
disappointment clouds my eyes
yet mahogany crayons under the heat of a blow dryer
permit fluid movement again
and brown skin and red heart under the light of the SON
regain elasticity again
they stretch
they smile freely again
they bend
they grow
they love anyway
they hope again
and even glazed eyes can become new again
as I let the drip drop
from my eyes and onto canvases
a cycle of healing
and living
and growing
exhaling
healing and freeing my soul within

Human Excellence

I hate to admit it
but I am human
fully human
fully feeling
sometimes feeling fear
and anger
and agitation
and anxiety
insecure and terrified
yet fit for the fight
weak and strong
soft yet a rock
So, I still myself
resisting the urge to phone a friend
allowing this poem and God's ear to be enough
to be the arms my shivering heart flees to
My heart and mind ache
roller-coaster of hope and frustration
as fruition seems to be so slippery in my hands
so slippery, I can't seem to get a grip
My sight is blurred
struggling to discern between smokescreens, ghosts, and reality
struggling to SEE
and be
and be fully
and be right
and arrive
and achieve
and break through
and SEE with open eyes what only my closed eyes have seen
What will be awesome about my story
is not that I didn't fear
is not that I was always confident or right
what will be awesome about my story
is not that I'm the most beautiful or witty or funny or feisty
what will be awesome about my story
is that I mustered up courage
to press on
that I bore the pain and overcame
that I walked past insecurities and embarrassment
that I kept going
that I dreamed again
that I got up again and again and again
that I loved
that I spoke up
that I believed anyway
that God came through for me

Not Stuck, FREE

It's over, officially
the unofficial has ended
sometimes movement is required
necessary
crucial
even when you don't have all the pieces
all the answers
all the light
that would situate you
in a level of comfort
security
sure enough to walk
sometimes it's the darkness
that prompts you to take a step
to take steps
in hope
in hope
that somehow
somewhere
there's more light
more light
more life
so..
so I sojourner on
becoming light
shining on feet that feel stuck
hoping hearts that feel hopeless
dispelling smokescreens of defeat
mustard-seeding my way
mountains in seas
mine and others
embracing the pain of progress
rather than rotting away
limping
but free
soon to be sprinting
a beacon and light
a mouthpiece yelling:
"YOU ARE NOT stuck!"
you are free
you are loved

written 6.25.12

My Brother's Keeper

A Response to Antoine Fisher’s “Who Will Cry for the Little Boy”

To the little boy inside the man

I want you to know I see you

My heart aches, and tears fall

Because I cry for you

I cry for the little boy

Buried inside the man

I cry but I won’t stop there

I’ll fight for you too, I’ll fight and lend a hand.

I will fight for the little boy

Lost inside my man

I will fight for the little boy

That he may live fully and smile again

I will fight for the little boy

Who’s cried himself to sleep

I will fight for the little boy

I’ll be strong for him when he feels weak

I will fight for the little boy

Crying inside my man

Waiting with tissue for every tear

Loving him the best I can

I will fight for the little boy

Alone inside my man

By his side and in his corner

Until he never feels alone again

I will hold the little boy

He’ll never walk burning sand again

‘Cause I’ll be lifting him up diligently

As a wife who always prays for her man, as a woman who ever prays for her friend

I will fight for the little boy

Who’s died again and again

I’ll cover him with sword and shield

That no arrow will touch him again

I will fight for the little boy

Alone he will never fight again

In battle, his back I will ever have

Like David and Johnathan, I’ll be his friend

I will fight for the little boy

Loving him with all my might

And even when I am weary and weak

For him, the God in me will stand up and fight

I will cry for the little boy

Because when he aches, I do too

I will fight for the little boy

Who’s never had his own

Bricks and clay, I’ll lay the foundation

Creating for him a home

I’ll war for that little boy

Persistent outside the door until he lets me in

Salve for his eyes until he’s able to see

He’ll never be alone again

I’ll fight for that little boy

His peaceful cove he shall have

Fears released, Rest he shall have

His heart again shall smile and laugh

Never again will he have to fight alone

Or have to prove or protect himself again

But he’ll stand in faith, under-girded

Knowing that every battle he wins

I will fight for the little boy

Don’t worry, I am skilled you see

Because I’ve spent the majority of my 31 years

Fighting for the girl inside of me

Who will cry for the little boy?

Crying and lost inside the man?

The Holy Spirit who is within, a guarantee

Is going to rescue that boy and man.

Soon that man will walk in manifested victory

Free, life more abundantly

While the little boy lies on the carpet of the man’s heart

Free, content, and stretched out happily

Who will cry for the little boy?

Soon he will never cry again.

To the man, I say be encouraged

You will soon find happiness again

Another Step. Another Dream Brought to Fruition: My First Art Showcase

Finding A New Home: Sold Originals

It's time to say farewell to some of my pieces...A bittersweet moment.  More sweet than bitter though.

I'm so grateful that someone would look at a PIECE OF ME and call it art.  It's a hug to my soul as I continue to learn to look in life's mirror and call each phase and stage a work of God's masterpiece.  A special thank you to Heidi Haggerty, MiMi Caldwell, and Emma Joy for giving some of my original pieces a new home.

"Joy"

Melted Crayon Art

Buyer:  Principal Heidi Haggerty

This piece was probably the toughest to let go.  The creation of "Joy" took a week. or so  I didn't know it, but I was learning a lesson just through the creation.  I couldn't make the crayons melt the way I wanted them to initially.  There were times when it looked like the lady had mascara running down her face.  The thing about wax though, is that when it dries you can scrape it off.  "Joy" was a process of melting and drying and scraping and melting again.  When I finally formed this face, I felt God reveal to me that this is what He does with my life.  He takes my mistakes and mishaps -some that even seem irrecoverable- and He transforms them into a masterpiece of a life.  He showed me that it's never too late for him to create something from what seems like a mess.  Sometimes it may take a while, but if I give him my life, myself, my mistakes and misfortunes...as well as time...he can make something beautiful out of what looked like a mess.

Allowing His JOY to expand on the inside, I say farewell to "Joy," hoping that as it finds a new home, its message will birth joy- .the joy of hope- in the hearts of those who see it.

"Stand"

Buyer:  Principal Heidi Haggerty

For the children who need us to teach them well, advocate for them, love them even when things are difficult...

For those who need to be awakened...

For those who need sight...

For those who need help finding their voices...

May we STAND UP for our kids/students.

May we be courageous enough to be our best selves on their behalf.

They need us to stand for them...

"Deep Blue Sea" Set

Buyer:  Emma Joy Pracher

"What if I am the One I'm Waiting On"

Buyer:  Monique Caldwell

It's time to Create and Be the change we want to see...

Less than 10 Hours Before My First Art Showcase...

With less than 10 hours left before my first art showcase, I'd just like to stop and say thank you.  Thank you Lord for this moment in time- this moment in my life.  Thank you for the moments that led me here.  Thank you for mustard seeds that added up to actionable faith.  Thank you for the support and belief in me from family and loved ones.  Thank you for my mom and dad who see my potential.  Thank you for a sister that gets excited for me.  Thank you for Jeremy who will lift loads, make suggestions, and give of himself, his time, and his money to help me grow.  Thank you for every milestone and stepping stone.  Thank you for Busboys and Poets and Carol Dyson who put my works on display.  Thank you for people who've celebrated my postcards.  Thank you for tears used to wet my paintbrush and create masterpieces.

Lord thank you for hope.  Thank you for dreams.  Thank you for allowing me to see this day.  It's a little after midnight, but I couldn't sleep without acknowledging you.

Thank you for giving me "dreams, goals, and visions," and for allowing me to see some of them come to fruition.  This gives me fuel and hope and stirs my faith to keep believing for it all:
for lasting happiness, for a life that's a light and blessing to others, for an awesome marriage and family of my own, for love that puts the fairy tale books to shame.

You have been so good to me.

YOU have kept me.  YOU have continued to usher me into greater spaces and places for your glory and for my soul's delight and for the blessing of mankind.

Thank you.

I look up and see the piece "Faith and Grace."

I look up and I see YOU and me, Lord.

Thank you.

I lay down now Lord and rest.  Less than 10 hours left until my first show.  A true testament to faith walking and your grace creating and sustaining the way.  I am so grateful Lord.

Thank you.

Good night Daddy.

Made to Be Loved

like cracked lips in need of Vaseline
like bellies in need of food
like lungs in need of fresh air
like ash in need of lotion
like skin in need of sunbeams
like eyes in need of beauty
like winter in need of heating
and summer in need of cool air
like plants in need of watering
like ears in need of both silence and melodies
like morning breath in need of Crest
like my back in need of massaging
like windshields in need of wipers
like beds in need of blankets
like tubs in need of running water
like gas in need of release
like toenails in need of clipping
like books in need of reading
like songs in need of listening
like legs in need of dancing
is my heart in need of caring
my voice in need of hearing
my ears in need of speaking
my shoulder in need of rubbing
my hands in need of holding
my body in need of cuddling
my lips in need of kissing
my arms in need of caressing
my dreams in need of believing
my value, strength, beauty in need of seeing
I was made to be loved

Back Where I Belong

By Ashley Jataun Moore

4.29.12

You spoke

And You said

“Be still and know that I am God”*

You told me You’d be exalted,

That Your glory would be revealed

But I got antsy

Unsatisfied

Quite frustrated to exact

And from discontentment, I moved

Away from trust; away from rest

Hashing and rehashing

Thinking

Talking

Trying to figure and work things out

But YOU are SO good

You held me

You held me

While I was tossing and turning

You held me

While I was fumbling around, attempting to gather and reassemble broken pieces

You held me

Even when I refused to relax in Your care

I was picking up pieces You’d told me to lay down

Weighted and unsettled, when you’d already spoken peace

Confused and frustrated, when you’d told me to trust

I am sorry Lord...

True to Your essence,

Your remained faithful

Even when my faith faltered and dissipated

So good

So compassionate

You melt my heart time and time again

So patient

So loving

You wait for me

So I bring You back the pieces

Trading You my pieces for Your peace

I bring you back the pieces

Laying them in your hands

Potter, Creator, Resurrector

There are no impossibilities in Your hands

Your heart

Pure, compassionate, wanting the best for me

Your thoughts

All-knowing,

Wise, full of truth and understanding

I bringing you all the pieces

Laying them in your hands

Now, free from the load You had been trying to carry

I run on

I run on

In Your joy and strength

Your peace:

My helium-

My heart, my thoughts, my eyes

Lifted

*Psalm 46:10

Armor: Necessities of Life

"Helmet of Salvation and Breastplate of Righteousness"

Hope

Hope is my helium
Rising from my spirit
Lifting my soul
Buoyant
Resilient
Cannot be held down
A seed inserted long ago
Tiny in size, but dynamic in its work
Stronger than the Incredible Hulk
Indestructible
A seed within that cannot be aborted
Birthing babies of faith
And children of manifestations

Hope is my helium
It rises at the oddest of times
Whispering
Yelling
"You will LIVE and not die."

Hope is my helium
Raising me up
My alarm clock in the morning
My lullaby at night
Televising news reports of fruition of hopes once deferred
Pointing out stars
Stretching my hands toward them

Hope is my helium
And like it, I rise

Fruitful Tears

I thank God for my pen
and keyboard
and paintbrush

My tears:  ink, keys, strokes
dropping like T-Mobile's calls
too frequent
pillow there to catch them
paper there to catch them
screen there to catch them
canvas there to catch them
and transform them into masterpieces
and Kleenex for the next soul
who reads and sees my words and pictures

The View: From the Streets of Charlotte

The View: " Raindrops in Atlanta"

Photograph by Ashley Moore

"Raindrops in Atlanta"

Soaking Up His Light

Her heart and arms, solar panels

absorbing HIS light and love and warmth and identity

Lights Out Haikus

(Picture from Google Images and adl-lightbulbs.com)

Like shaking a bulb

Some things have shaken my heart

Causing bulbs to blow

Blown bulbs, hurt places

Dim vision, sadness in eyes

disillusionment

Thank God for SONlight

Better than generators 

Giving me light again

(Picture from Google Images, ocpoetry.wordpress.com)

Seasons

Hello's and Farewell's

See-you-later's and Good-bye's

Things coming full circle

Ecclesiastes 3:1-9

In a season of accepting seasons

of learning seasons

of entering and exiting 

seasons

a season of 

embracing seasons

Today is the day, I picked up my work that has been on display at Busboys and Poets since last year.

Extremely grateful

Privileged

Blessed

God has allowed me to experience great things in every season of my life.

Lunchbreak Haikus 5.7.5

Peace looks like a bench

Me sitting crisscrossed with snacks

Outside on lunchbreak

Dogs barking away

Sun warming my soul and face

Peace being restored

Emoji Haiku 5-7-5

Thanks for emoji

That can smile in faith until

My lips can smile too